A Place Called Surrender

I got to sit and drink coffee with a dear friend today, we get together every so often and talk and she is one of those special people who is just so authentic. We got to talking about one of the very first times we had ever hung out. We remembered so vividly how we had both just recently had a baby (she had her first, and I had just had twins. My 2nd and 3rd children, respectively) we were STRUGGLING! We both battled  postpartum depression and were severely sleep deprived. I remember sitting next to each other crying about how tired and overwhelmed with motherhood we both were. I think our husbands stood in the dinning room lamenting what to do with their clearly insane wives. As we looked back and laughed about those days, we were also reminded at how good God is. I couldn't imagine being who I am today, at the point where I was then,  sobbing on the couch in the arms of another mom who felt the same way. I couldn't see past my storm and see the power that pushed my storm away, all I could see was my now. And my now said, I couldn't do it. But God has the strength to move our mountains, he has the power to calm our storms. God is the power that says, "It's okay, you don't have to do this alone." God always seems to bring me to this place, it's a place called surrender. Every trial  I've ever faced brings me down a long, often painful and confusing road to a place called surrender. The journey there is marked by effort. I start out so strong, sure and confidant. But as I continue on I'm hit from every side with opposition, and I have to throw more and more effort into the journey. Sometimes, my kids are my opposition, most of the time it's my own shortcomings that keep stalling me. As my journey moves on, I become keenly aware that I have bit off more then I can chew. Before I know it, I can't remember why I choose this road to begin with, or rather, why this road was chosen for me. But something beautiful happens at Surrender, that is the place where we say. "I can't do this!" Admitting failure is the beginning of strength.

  2 Corinthians 12:9 says "9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 

God doesn't delight in our weakness, but he does delight in making weakness great. God loves to give power to the weak, he delights in rescuing his children! When I finally surrender, it is no longer my effort that leads the way, but my God begins to lead and where God leads he always clears the path. Is the road finally easy? Far, far, from it. But at the point of surrender I find that I finally know where my journey leads. When God leads, the destination is always the same, it leads me closer to being like Christ. 

Are you in a place that is hard, are you waking each day and STRIVING to push forward against what feels like a brick wall. Perhaps this is your place of Surrender. Maybe it's time to let God lead, and rest in the power that He has to do what needs to be done.....

Isn't Good....Good??

Hi, I'm Erin. Maybe you know me, maybe you just sorta stumbled upon me. Either way, I'm glad you're here. I want to have a place where I can share about what God is teaching me, what I'm walking through, and maybe even have a chance to encourage or challenge you as you walk through your life. You see, we are all on a journey, we walk this earth for only a short while and what we do here matters a great deal. I believe that God, the God of the Bible is real. I believe that all he said and did according to the Bible is true, I believe that from the moment humanity fell from perfection in the garden of Eden, God has been working a great plan of redemption, to once again bring unity and relationship between mankind and God back into order. I believe that this great plan came to a moment of great climax at the death and resurrection of God's son Jesus Christ who is the redeemer who took my place on that cross and shed his perfect blood so that I could be saved. And because of that work done at the cross, I believe that God wants to use me to bring others to that place of acceptance and salvation through Christ Jesus, and that it is God's desire that all men be saved and brought back into relationship with Him. I say all that so that you can see where I come from in my following posts.

 I am not ashamed to tell you that I am not even close to perfect, in fact I am so incredibly flawed! I have spent most of my life trying to earn God's favor, earn His affection and maybe, if I'm good enough, earn a spot in heaven. Doesn't even need to be a big spot, I'd settle for a tiny shack on the furthest part of heaven-- maybe next to the heavenly porta-potty. I'm not to picky, I just want to be sure that I'd end up in heaven as opposed to the alternative. But God, well, He wouldn't settle for that. The more I tried to do good, to be good, the more acutely aware I am of how much I mess up. Yeah, I've never killed anyone, and I don't steal....anymore. But lie, yeah. Cheat? Sometimes. How about those idols? Oh no...well not gold ones anyways... but I sure have a lot of things I put before God. Like my time, my money, my family, friends, kids. Heck, I even put my GOOD work above God. See, I didn't really love Him, I didn't even KNOW Him! I wanted what He could give me, heaven.

 But what if living this Christian life is about more then getting into heaven, what if living out our faith is about more then how much we give to charity and about where we spend our Sunday's? What if God is asking us to just to love Him? And what if we really fell in love with God? What if, out of that Love we have for God and the love He gives to us, we begin to live out our faith? Would we act the same, would we treat each other the same? Do you think, just maybe, we could receive a love that is so all encompassing and powerful that it supersedes anything this life can offer? A love so unlike any worldly love you may have, or haven't received, that it starts to heal the pains we've lived through, breakdown walls that we've built up, releases joy and peace into our tragic and unfulfilled lives!

You see this is the challenge that brought me out from a dark and scary place in my life, I felt God ask me this simple question: "Do you love me?" and the question pierced my soul, when I finally stopped pretending to be who I thought God wanted me to be and answered the question honestly, it was a resounding. "No. I have no idea how to love you, or what that even means."  No, I loved the idea of God, but I did not love God. From there God showed me what love is, through the next few months and years God woo'ed me. As I began to see this amazing love that God had for me, I was overwhelmed with emotion! I had no choice but to respond in love back to the God who loved me this much! That was the start of an amazing journey, one that will continue till I die, one that changed my life. As you read this blog I pray that you will be challenged by the God who loves you. Be honest with yourself, it's time to stop playing church and get to know the God who is real and tangible, working and powerful. Will you let go?